We frequently get requests from readers about books—for themselves, for their kids, for their doctors and family members and schools. Over time we’ve compiled a list of affirming books that we think are helpful, stimulating, and often beautiful. They appear below. The list is roughly organized according to age of audience—board books (age 1-3), picture books (age 3-8), chapter books (age 8-12), middle grade books (age 11-14), young adult books (high school), and adult books—and alphabetically by author name.
As we write and speak publicly about issues of gender, we are aware that the topic can also be a metaphor for all the ways kids can be different. And so we’ve included books that address not only gender identity and LGBT families, but sensory processing disorder, race, diversity and nonconformists of all sorts, and, of course—and sadly—bullying. Whether or not any particular issue applies to a particular child, books about difference of any kind can be helpful for understanding and accepting all difference. This is why it’s so important that we not only read a broad range of these types of books to our own children, but that we introduce these books into our schools, libraries, doctors’ waiting rooms, local bookstores, and anywhere else we can think of to share them with the wider world.
Take a look and see what you think of these books. If you have a book to recommend for our list, let us know! If we like it, we’ll add it to the list. Thank you! And happy reading.
Board Books (age 1-3)
- Emma and Meesha My Boy: A Two Mom Story by Kaitlyn Taylor Considine
- Everywhere Babies by Susan Meyers
- Mommy, Mama, and Me by Leslea Newman
- Daddy, Papa, and Me by Leslea Newman
Picture Books (age 3-8)
- How My Family Came to Be—Daddy, Papa and Me by Andrew Aldrich
- Brothers of the Knight by Debbie Allen
- The Bully Blockers Club by Teresa Bateman
- Derek the Knitting Dinosaur by Mary Blackwood
- Ballerino Nate by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley
- Uncle Bobby’s Wedding by Sarah Brannen
- The Different Dragon by Jennifer Bryan
- Be Who You Are by Jennifer Carr
- Operation Marriage by Cynthia Chin-Lee
- Princess Smartypants by Babette Cole
- ABC: A Family Alphabet Book by Bobbie Combs, Desiree Keane and Brian Rappa
- King and King by Linda De Haan and Stern Nijland
- The Art Lesson by Tomie dePaola
- Oliver Button is a Sissy by Tommie dePaola
- 10,000 Dresses by Marcus Ewert
- The Sissy Duckling by Harvey Fierstein
- Tough Boris by Mem Fox
- Whoever You Are by Mem Fox
- The Princess Knight by Cornelia Funke
- Elena’s Serenade by Campbell Geeslin
- X: A Fabulous Child’s Story by Lois Gold
- Antonio’s Card by Rigoberto Gonzalez
- All Families are Different by Sol Gordon
- Chester’s Way by Kevin Henkes
- Chrysanthemum by Kevin Henkes
- Amazing Grace by Mary Hoffman
- Jacob’s New Dress by Sarah and Ian Hoffman
- Horace and Morris but Mostly Dolores by James Howe
- Pinky and Rex by James Howe
- Cinder Edna by Ellen Jackson
- Just Like Josh Gibson by Angela Johnson
- Rough Tough Charley by Verla Kay
- My Princess Boy by Cheryl Kilodavis
- The Story of Ferdinand by Munro Leaf
- A Porcupine Named Fluffy by Helen Lester
- Tacky the Penguin by Helen Lester
- Mookey the Monkey Gets Over Being Teased by Heather Suzanne Lonczak
- My Secret Bully by Trudy Ludwig
- Nobody Knew What to Do: A Story About Bullying by Becky Ray McCain
- A Bad Case of Stripes by Peggy Moss
- Say Something by Peggy Moss
- A Fire Engine for Ruthie by Leslea Newman
- The Boy Who Cried Fabulous by Leslea Newman
- Donovan’s Big Day by Leslea Newman
- Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
- A Tale of Two Daddies by Vanita Oelschlager
- The Family Book by Todd Parr
- It’s Okay to be Different by Todd Parr
- Thank You, Mr. Falker by Patricia Polacco
- And Tango Makes Three by Justin Richardson
- All I Want to Be is Me by Phyllis Rothblatt
- All Families Are Special by Norma Simon
- This is Gabriel Making Sense of School by Hartley Steiner
- Stop Picking On Me by Pat Thomas and Lesley Harker
- The Seven Chinese Sisters by Kathy Tucker
- The Duke Who Outlawed Jelly Beans by Johnny Valentine
- One Dad, Two Dads, Brown Dad, Blue Dads by Johnny Valentine
- Am I Really Different? by Evelien Van Dort
- Naked Mole Rat Gets Dressed by Mo Willems
- William’s Doll by Charlotte Zolotow
Chapter Books (age 8-12)
- The Case of the Stolen Scarab by Nancy Garden
- The Liberation of Gabriel King by K. L. Going
- Vampire Island by Adele Griffin
- The Knaveheart’s Curse: A Vampire Island Story by Adele Griffin
- V is for…Vampire: A Vampire Island Story by Adele Griffin
- The Popularity Papers by Amy Ignatow
- Confessions of a Former Bully by Trudy Ludwig
- Just Kidding by Tracy Ludwig
- Nothing Wrong With A Three-Legged Dog by Graham McNamee
- Riding Freedom by Pam Munoz Ryan
- Bullies Are a Pain in the Brain by Trevor Romain and Elizabeth Verdick
- Tomboy Trouble by Sharon Dennis Wyeth
Middle Grade Books (age 11-14)
- If You Believe in Mermaids….Don’t Tell by A.A. Philips
- We Are One: The Story of Bayard Rustin by Larry Dane Brimner
- The Secret Fruit of Peter Paddington by Brian Francis
- The Trouble with Babies by Martha Freeman and Cat Bowman Smith
- The Misfits by James Howe
- Totally Joe by James Howe
- What I Know Now by Rodger Larson
- Crash by Jerry Spinelli
- Feathers by Jacqueline Woodson
Young Adult Books (high school)
- Luna by Julie Anne Peters (and check out Peters’s other young adult fiction)
- So Hard to Say by Alex Sanchez
- Parrotfish by Ellen Wittlinger
Books for Adults
- Hate Hurts: How Children Learn and Unlearn Prejudice by the Anti-Defamation League, Caryl Stern-LaRosa & Ellen Hofheimer Bettmann
- The Bully-Free Classroom: Over 100 Tips and Strategies for Teachers K-8 by Allan L. Beane
- Creating Emotionally Safe Schools: A Guide for Educators and Parents by Jane Bluestein
- The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Families by Stephanie Brill and Rachel Pepper
- The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School—How Parents and Teachers and Help Break the Cycle of Violence by Barbara Coloroso
- Schools Where Everyone Belongs: Practical Strategies for Reducing Bullying by Stan Davis
- Empowering Bystanders in Bullying Prevention by Stan Davis with Julia Davis
- Raising My Rainbow by Lori Duron
- Gender Born, Gender Made by Diane Ehrensaft
- Transgender Warriors: Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman by Leslie Feinberg
- Easing the Teasing: Helping Your Child Cope with Name-Calling, Ridicule, and Verbal Bullying by Judy S. Freedman
- Boys and Girls Together: Improving Gender Relationships in K-6 Classrooms by Tamara Grogan
- The Out-of-Synch Child: Recognizing and Coping with Sensory Processing Disorder by Carol Stock Kranowitz
- Gender, Bullying, and Harassment: Strategies to End Sexism and Homophobia in Schools by Elizabeth J. Meyer
- Relational Aggression and Bullying: It’s More Than Just a Girl Thing by Nancy Mullin-Rindler
- Bullying at School: What We Know and What We Can Do (Understanding Children’s Worlds) by Dan Olweus
- Safe School Ambassadors: Harnessing Student Power to Stop Bullying and Violence by Rick Phillips, John Linney, and Chris Pack
- The Respectful School: How Educators and Students Can Conquer Hate and Harassment by William Preble & Stephen Wessler
- The Riddle of Gender: Science, Activism and Transgender Rights by Deborah Rudacille
- Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls by Rachel Simmons
- Bullyproof: A Teacher’s Guide on Teasing and Bullying for Use with Fourth and Fifth Grade Students by Nan Stein
- Sensational Journeys: 48 Personal Stories of Sensory Processing Disorder by Hartley Steiner